4 Situations In Which It Is A Good Idea To Return With An Ex-partner
Did things with your partner reach a point where it was no longer possible to continue without hurting each other? Are you considering the idea of getting back with an ex? But would this be a good idea?
These doubts are normal and very common. After all, if your relationship ended, it’s for a reason. Usually giving a second chance is a bad idea because it can lead to a vicious cycle or toxic relationship.
However, there are some cases where giving that opportunity can work. Here we will tell you in which cases you should consider the idea. This does not mean that you should forgive and forget everything every time that person fails you, but you should analyze if you are interested in resuming that relationship.
1. There is much more than love
The first factor why you should consider going back with an ex-partner is that that person offers you what you want for your life. We are not talking about material things, but about psychic and emotional well-being.
A common example of this can be found in that relationship ended because one of the two had to leave town and they did not want a long-distance relationship. If now that person has returned and you realize that they continue to offer you security, affection, fun, loyalty and friendship, maybe they could find that they do really love each other.
It might seem that we are talking about comfort and not wanting to meet new people. But it is worth asking yourself if you would like to take up what was pending.
In the end, you may discover that the time apart served for both of you to go out with other people and see that this relationship had many points in its favor. Relationships that occur after a distance separation usually return with great strength and commitment on the part of both of you.
2. When the problem is not bigger than love
The decision to get back with an ex is completely up to you and how important you are to what made them break up. It also depends on how much the two people have evolved, the responsibility they have assumed for their actions and to what extent they have worked on their personal growth.
It is important that you value the situation and put things in perspective. There is no need to hold on to prejudices and melodramas. There are issues that are not very relevant but that at the moment seem like a big problem because we are in a bad mood or the day has been very bad and that is the last straw.
It may also be the case that the situation no longer has relevance because the conditions have changed or because it no longer affects you.
Here you have to weigh if the relationship was good and if the problem could be overcome or not. If you decide to give yourself another chance, clarify the issue and give it a full stop. The most important thing is to overcome it definitively and not to bring it up again if it is not going to bring you anything good.
3. Actions are really meaningful
Before going back with an ex-partner, analyze if his actions really go in the same direction as his words. We all know that words can be beautiful but that does not mean that they are real or sincere. You have to be consistent.
For example, if they broke up because he was very jealous and he tells you that he has learned to control that attitude, you may feel interested. Before agreeing to continue the relationship, analyze their behavior well to detect signs that deny it:
- Does he ask you all the time where you are and with whom?
- Take your cell phone without asking and read your messages?
You have to listen to your instincts and not let yourself be enveloped by the words you want to hear. There are situations, such as infidelity or jealousy, in which you must be very careful before resuming the relationship as they are not easy matters to change.
4. They are both committed to improving the relationship.
Another factor to consider before getting back with an ex is their commitment to improving the relationship. Giving a second chance means that both of you work lovingly and responsibly. Sincerity must prevail in communication.
Some people have worked very hard to maintain the relationship until, suddenly, they got tired and ended it. At that point, the other person realizes what they have lost and tries to return to the commitment.
The problem appears when the person who already worked for a long time is no longer willing to work. If you can give the opportunity but hope that this time it is he who conquers you and works all the time to improve the situation, it may not work and only make the situation worse.
A good option in this case would be to take the couple relationship to reflect well on how to act and, based on this, establish new parameters to strengthen the commitment and make everything flow correctly.
Going back with an ex can work if you both get engaged
There are those who say that once you have finished with someone, you have to turn the page completely. This is valid but it is not always the right thing to do. The important thing is that both are comfortable.
The decision can only be made by you and should be based on your personal emotions, expectations and commitments. Your argument has to be solid. Then talk to that person and if they are on the same page they can give themselves the opportunity. But you always have to take care of the emotional health of both.